Sunday, May 27, 2007
Drinking Games
According to my humans, this is the way I should properly drink my water. It's soooooo boring to do it this way. I have so few ways to entertain myself, and I never want to resort to chasing my own tail (which I have had to do on a few occasions).
Instead, I'll teach all you quadrupeds the fun way to drink your water. It's the raccoon way, and it's genius.
Step 1
Put your face in close proximity to the water bowl focusing on the center most part of the bowl beneath the water. Get your paw into position and aim for the center of the bowl.
Step 2
When you have locked position, thrust your paw directly onto your target location and pull it directly back out again in the same straight forward motion. Some amateurs would have you think it is a sweeping motion, but that is not efficient and is least effective. This is not a scoop, but a stab.
Step 3
Lick the water out of your paw. The water will taste better and go down smooth. Repeat the process as many times as you want until your thirst is quenched. When you are done, simply shake the water off your paw with a quick back and forth jolt. Be sure to hit as much furniture, wall space, and possibly humans as you can. You can collect points for your coverage.
Thus ends today's lesson on the most fun way to drink your water.
**Warning: Said system may cause your humans to get angry with you. This is part of my fun, but may not be for everyone. Play at your own risk.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
Dear Bean,
What if you don't like to get your paws wet, but you are thirsty?
Concerned in the field behind your house,
Miss Mouse E. Higgins
Dear Mouse,
Just don't drink that way. It's not a requirement, or a dare. It's just more fun, fool.
Sincerely,
Bean
Dear Mr. Bean,
I have also found that placing items in your water bowl can be a rewarding days work. To make a mess of my water bowl, I place toy mice, milk rings, q-tips, hair ties, and other small objects I find around the house in my water bowl. I then procede to make a mess by flipping them around in my warer bowl. I find that the humans find this to be amusing and don't mind the clean up.
Your friend and loyal reader,
Miss Lily
Wapakoneta, Ohio
Post a Comment