I Am Not A Pachyderm

Photos: Beans as an Elephant

My human turned me into an elephant. I'm so humiliated. Sometimes I hate being a domesticated house cat. Hiss....

First Assistant Bean

Photo: Me Under the Deck

What you may not know is that part of my job as house cat is to be first photo assistant to my human. She's always cooking up projects around here and she often needs me to do security sweeps under the decks and around the yard for stray animals and bibbets. It's a tough job, but I'm cat enough for the job. Notice the spiderwebs I cleaned out with my whiskers. I take my job seriously.

Marcia Kitty

My man human hit me square in the nose with a frisbee. I felt like Marcia Brady. Evil!! At least I got lots of treats and catnip from all their guilt.

Bean Sneaks Out

Don't tell anyone, but I snuck out. It was liberating!

Oh How I Loves Me Some Catnip

This one's for you Derek and Edie. I only wish catnip did for you what it does for me.

Another One Down

My good pal Paul was captured and behatted. I knew she wouldn't escape for long. Sorry 'bout your luck Paul. A hat and a baby all in the same week. Glad I live at this house where the tuna juice is abundant and no one is pulling my ears or tail.

All In A Day's Work

Photo: Bean on the Job

Dear Derek,

It has come to my attention recently that you would like to know a little more about what I do. My job at this company, has many facets, but one that few animals (and people for that matter) realize is that of Feline Quality Assurance Engineer(FQAE). It is my job to test everything. Now I like to think I am very proactive, since most times I test things before I am even asked.

In the photo featured above, I am testing a miniature grocery shopping cart for you Derek. It is a good thing I did because it worked well for you when you last came to visit. It turns out that you sometimes conduct quality assurance yourself. For instance, the ladle that you tested by chasing me around and around the headquarters of Carrier Industries. Good job Derek, good job.

I hope this gives you a good idea of the responsibilities of a FQAE. Thank you for your inquiry Derek.

Sincerely,
Bean
Feline Quality Assurance Engineer
Carrier Industries